Its Kevin

Category: Jokes

  • Turkey Day Humor

    Thanks Giving is a time of fun and fellowship. Its a time of turkey, dressing, football, and beer. its also the time when the best and baudy lines can be used from our relatives and all we can say is “Yep, there goes Grandpa again.”

    Things you can only say on Thanksgiving day!
    1. Talk about a huge breast!
    2. Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist.
    3. It’s Cool Whip time!
    4. If I don’t undo my pants, I’ll burst!
    5. That’s one terrific spread!
    6. I’m in the mood for a little dark meat.
    7. Are you ready for seconds yet?
    8. Its a little dry, do you still want to eat it?
    9. Just wait your turn, you’ll get some!
    10. Don’t play with your meat.
    11. Just spread the legs open and stuff it in!
    12. Do you think you’ll be able to handle all these people at once?
    13. I didn’t expect everyone to come at once!
    14. You still have a little bit on your chin.
    15. How long will it take after you stick it in?
    16. You’ll know it’s ready when it pops up.
    17. Wow, I didn’t think I could handle all of that!

    An RVAMaverick creation.

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  • Obama Goes to Heaven

    Yes I know that people are militant about Barak Obama. He is the change, the light ,and the most awesoem president we as citizens have had. But you have got to admit that this joke here is funny. I heard it from an Obama supporter.

    Having arrived at the Gates of Heaven, Barrack Obama meets a man with a beard. “Are you Mohammad?” he asks. “No my son, I am St. Peter; Mohammad is higher up.” Peter then points to a ladder that rises into the clouds.

    Delighted that Mohammad should be higher than St. Peter, Obama climbs the ladder in great strides, climbs up through the clouds and comes into a room where he meets another bearded man. He asks again, “Are you Mohammad?” “Why no,’ he answers, “I am Moses; Mohammad is higher still.”

    Exhausted, but with a heart full of joy he climbs the ladder yet again, he discovers a larger room where he meets an angelic looking man with a beard. Full of hope, he asks again, “Are you Mohammad?” “No, I am Jesus, the Christ; you will find Mohammad higher up.”

    Mohammad higher than Jesus! Man, oh man! Obama can hardly contain his delight and climbs and climbs ever higher.
    Once again, he reaches an even larger room where he meets this truly
    magnificent looking man with a silver white beard and once again repeats his
    question:
    ‘Are you Mohammad?’
    he gasps as he is by now, totally out of breath from all his climbing.
    ‘No, my son, I am Almighty God, the Alpha and the Omega, but you look
    exhausted. Would you like a cup of coffee?’

    Obama says, ‘Yes please!’ As God looks behind him, he claps his hands and
    yells out: ‘Hey, Mohammad, two coffees!’

    An RVAMaverick creation.

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